Ep 52. Something Amazing Is Happening

I am Kym Showers, and this is Reinvented After 40, episode number 52: Something Amazing Is Happening.

Hey, friends. Welcome to Reinvented After 40, a podcast for all you women in the second half of life who are ready to take responsibility for your own wellbeing and create a life you love living.

I’m your host, Kym Showers, and after spending the first 40 years of my life people-pleasing and following all the rules, I was exhausted and ready for a change. I reinvented myself. I stopped outsourcing my happiness. And I’ve been brave enough to live a different kind of life.

I’ll be here each week to help you do the same thing. It’s gonna be fun. Let’s go.

Good morning, everyone, welcome back to my show. I love saying that. Welcome back to my show. I have a show with 52 episodes. Almost a whole year I have been creating, producing, writing, imagining, working at this podcast. And something amazing is happening here. It always is. It’s happening here in this episode, in this morning that I’m recording it, it’s happening here in my life and it’s happening in your life. Something amazing is always happening in your life, whether you know it, whether you’re aware of it or you’re not aware of it and you don’t know it.

I’m here to promise you that something amazing right now is happening. So, something amazing is always happening in my life. And I just have so many things that I want to talk to you and share with you this morning about that. Every little thing I do I’m kind of intentional about and I’m kind of aware of, and I’m very present with. And that to me is amazing. I get so much out of my days. I increase my excitement and my joy for life every single day because of the thoughts that I think. And one of those thoughts is something amazing is happening.

So last week when I was in Orlando and when I was flying, mind you I’m going to remind you, and I’ve told you this before. I flew first class to Orlando and flew first class back from Orlando. And I did not spend my life flying first class. I did not spend my life at five star hotels. This is all somewhat new to me. This is all the amazingness of my life and everything that I’ve wanted I have.

Something amazing has always been happening in the background of my life because I’ve always been intentional, because I’ve always had a goal especially in the last five years have built a relationship with my future self. And I know I talk to you so much about that, building a relationship with your future self, that takes some knowing and some practice. You have to get creative in your brain.

You have to design and create who your future self is, your dream self, your highest self, your best self. And then you get to work creating her and showing up as her, and thinking like her, and feeling like her, and acting like her every single day. Something amazing happens when you do that. So, when I was at the mastermind I had that thought, I kept having that thought. And when I was in the plane I kept having that thought that something amazing is happening, something amazing is going to happen in this next week.

And so many amazing things happened. I created that for myself with that thought. That’s all I saw. I saw all the amazing things. I made so many new friends. I was in a room with – I don’t know, honestly, I tried to count how many of us there were. I think there were 150 of us, I’m just going to say that. I don’t know for sure the number, 150 coaches at The Four Seasons Hotel together in this unbelievable atmosphere, in this unbelievable container that was created by my new mastermind coach. Her name is Stacey Boehman and her mastermind is actually called 200K Mastermind.

And she was incredible, and her and her team created beyond amazing container for us to experience our highest level of thinking. So, we were all together every morning and then we broke off into smaller groups every afternoon. And my group had about 25 of us in this group with a coach who was brand new to me. I didn’t know who she was and she was the perfect coach for me. She was pretty spectacular. And she has just different thoughts than I’ve ever heard before. And that was the key for me.

It’s always the key for me because we have limited thinking because we keep rinsing and repeating the same thoughts that we think are true. So, I do the same thing so that’s why I have to put myself in a room like this with women who think different thoughts, higher level thoughts that kind of break through my limits, my glass ceiling, my limited beliefs. Because you know what I think. I know and I believe, you guys, that we get to think anything we want.

And I also know for sure that the thoughts that got me here are not the same thoughts that are going to get me to where I want to go. So, I have to put myself in a room with people who think differently than I do, who I might be even a little intimidated by because they’ve already reached my goals. The goals that I’m working on right now, they’re working on different goals because they’ve already reached that goal. So, they get to be the example for me of what’s possible for me. So, I have to put myself in a room with them.

Something amazing always happens in that room. That’s the secret for us for growth. We have to say yes to the things that scare us, say yes to being with people that seem like it might be a little intimidating. That’s okay, that’s the perfect place to be. That’s where amazing things happen to our brain. So, the whole week my brain shifted. I like to think oh my gosh, my mind is blown because I’m thinking, I’m hearing things. And I was just writing, writing, writing because I wanted to remember the things that they were saying, the things that resonated with me and I wrote them all down.

And so, this last week I’ve been just kind of looking over the thoughts that I wrote down. And they were very, very powerful thoughts and a little bit different than the way that I have thought in the past. And I love that, I love picking up new thoughts. And so, this morning before I went to meet my trainer I actually posted a picture a picture of me and my trainer this morning after our workout on my story today. Hopefully you got to see it. I’ll post it again.

But I’m recording this on Thursday September 1st, so happy September. You will get this of course next Thursday September 7th. But before I went to work out this morning I cleaned out my refrigerator. And I did that to make room for party food because we’re having a party for my husband this weekend. He turns 60, 6 0 on September 11th but we are going to be out of town for a wedding on his birthday weekend. So, we planned a little family party, a two day party for Labor Day weekend.

So, my brother-in-law is going to come over, my brother and sister-in-law, my nephew and his girlfriend, my son, Riley, my daughter, Clancy, my son-in-law, Chiron, our two grandbabies, Goldie and Dolly. We’re going to all be together Saturday night. We’re going out for a really fun dinner together, a place called The Hitching Post. It’s my husband’s, one of his favorite spots, it’ll be very fun and special. And then on Sunday my brother-in-law, everybody’s coming to our house and we’re going to just have an all day party.

My brother-in-law’s going to be doing his specialty which is making homemade Chili Verde, rice and beans which is my husband’s favorite. And all of his favorite people will be here. And we’re going to toast him with some good whisky, and some cigars, and some fun stories. And so, I’m looking forward to that. But my fridge needed to be cleaned out to make room for some new food. And when I was doing this, this morning I was thinking about this is how it is for our brain.

To adopt new thoughts like the thought, something amazing is happening, we have to clean out the old thoughts that have maybe expired. That’s what I was doing this morning. I was looking at the expiration dates on salad dressings, and on lunchmeat, and on the greens that I buy in bags. And I was just looking at the expiration date. And if it was anywhere close to the expiration date I threw it out because I really don’t like old food.

My husband doesn’t mind old food so I honor him by keeping it around because he gets so disappointed if I throw something out that possibly could be eaten. So, I’m kind of generous with him in that way. But I really do like just absolutely the freshest food. That’s how I’m about new thoughts too. But we can’t squish new food in the fridge with old food. Everything gets a little mixed up and it’s hard to find the new food when we’ve kept the old food in there. There is no room for the new food. So, the new food needs to be easily found and right in its place so we can enjoy it.

We can put it to good use, that’s how our brain is, that’s why we need coaching because our coach helps us take out the old food. And everything that’s not useful for us anymore, the thoughts that have gotten us here but are absolutely not useful for us anymore because we want to make a change.

And whenever we want to make a change when we have a goal, that means that we have to find some new thoughts that we need to make room for in our brain to practice over, and over, and over until our brain gets used to this thought so that it becomes a belief so that we get the results that we want. That’s how that works. So, something amazing is happening. I promise you it is. If you have a thought like, I’ll never get the results that I want. I’ve tried, and tried, and tried, and I can’t get them. I want you to drop that thought. That’s an expired thought. That is not a useful thought.

I want you to make room for a more useful thought like something amazing is happening. I think that thought/ I believe that thought every day all day long even if I can’t see it, even if I don’t have my results yet. My future self is always telling me something amazing is happening. And my present self believes her because something amazing is always happening. And then this week on my Instagram page I gave you a thought that’s very useful for me and that thought is, focus on what’s working, that’s the thought, focus on what’s working.

I believe that thought. I think that thought all the time. Focus on what’s working. I never focus on what’s not working. And I just believe everything in my life is working. Everything in my life is working because I focus, I’ve trained my brain. I constrain my thoughts to what’s working. And so, everything is working. I don’t spend any of my mental or emotional energy thinking about what’s not working. And I know that I could if I wanted to but I don’t. So, I was trying to think of what you might be or what my clients bring to me about what’s not working.

You’re convinced it’s a fact that this isn’t working but I promise you it’s just a thought that it’s not working. What if it is working? Focus on how it’s working, how it might be working. So, I was trying to think of an example from my life. And remember I got my new car that I’m madly in love with. So, I got that at the end of May. So, it’s just been the most beautiful incredible car. I can’t even believe I have this car. It’s so badass, it’s so beautiful. I love driving it, it’s amazing. But it has a little glitch right now that I just discovered. I didn’t know about it when I bought it but now I know about it.

So, when the first time that I recognized it or I became aware of it was when I was driving back from my mastermind in June. We were up at El Dorado Hills and it was pretty warm and I had to drive through Sacramento on the way home. And it was 100 degrees or something. And about an hour and a half into the ride, my air conditioner stopped working. It didn’t stop blowing altogether but it just kind of blew not cold air. And I was like, “This is weird.” And my car was pretty new and I mean it’s a very high, like a very intellectual car.

So, there’s so many things about it that I don’t know how to work so I just thought it was user error, I just didn’t know how to work the air conditioner properly. So, it was kind of an uncomfortable ride most of the way home until it cooled off when I got closer to my house. It cooled off again and then the air conditioner started working again. So, I was like, “Huh.” I told Jeff about it and he’s like, “Yeah, we can probably figure that out.” Then the next time it happened was a month or maybe five or six weeks after that.

Till then it worked perfectly fine, and I kind of forgot about it. But when we were going up to Lake Tahoe for our family vacation I drove it, I drove my car, Jeff rode in the passenger seat and we picked up Riley, he flew up to Sacramento. We picked up Riley on the way to Lake Tahoe and it was hot in Sacramento. And it was hot from Sacramento to Lake Tahoe which is I don’t know, an hour and a half drive or an hour drive, I don’t know. But half way through my air conditioner stopped working again.

And so, then my boys believed me, they were 100% in like, Oh, mom, something’s wrong with your car.” Jeff was like, “Yeah, definitely something’s wrong with your car.” Because they tried to figure it out and it definitely was my car. So, I went online, I made an appointment to take my car in to get it fixed. I made the appointment and I couldn’t get in until this last Monday. So, I’m recording this on Thursday, I got it in this last Monday and I have to drive to Santa Barbara for the dealership. It’s not a super convenient thing but even that’s not a problem for me.

But I took the car in and got a loaner car and I just told them, “I’m not going to wait around because I have a full week and I need to get home. You just call me when the car is fixed.” And he said, “Perfect, great.” So, I drove home on Monday and just have done my regular week and he called me, Kevin, the guy at the dealership that’s in charge of the fix it department. I can’t remember what the name is right now. But I’ve established a very good relationship with Kevin and he’s been very kind to me.

They still, so yesterday was Wednesday, they’ve had my car since Monday, they still can’t figure out what’s wrong with the air conditioning because they’ve checked everything they know to check and everything that they know to check is fine. But they’re going to have to drive it in a hot climate for an hour to an hour and a half before they can find out what the problem is which is kind of interesting, isn’t that? So, they’re determined to figure it out. I’m determined to leave it with them until they figure it out and I know they will.

The whole reason I’m telling you this story is because everything is working for me, this is just not a problem for me. I still love my car 100%. I’m still just excited about my car. I do not let my brain try and create any drama for me about this because I know what our brains when they’re unmanaged, what they do. They will try and create drama so that we think about this as a problem. But I haven’t thought about this as a problem one time. I just haven’t. I’ve just known that everything is working and this is just a glitch that will get fixed.

And for the most part I live in a very cool climate and for the most part this is not a problem at all. And the few times I’ll drive in a warm climate by the time we do that I know they’re going to figure it out. In the meantime, I’m just very productive in my life. This little glitch hasn’t taken any mental or emotional energy from me, it is just not a problem.

And I was thinking, another example that people use all the time as an excuse, when Goldie was born, the day she was coming home from the hospital I was playing tennis and I tore my ACL, I snapped my ACL tendon right in half in my right knee. And that’s kind of a big deal when you’re an athlete, I consider myself an athlete. And I’ve had a couple of knee surgeries before. And I just decided and I went to my orthopedic and he let me know it snapped right in half and I had a couple options.

I could get surgery on it or I could just put a brace on it and strengthen my knee and be okay and just not play tennis anymore. And I decided that’s what I was going to do. I really did not want to have another knee surgery. For the last four years I haven’t played tennis but you know me, I’ve done a lot of things. And my leg has never been stronger. And I have not one time used my knee, my snapped ACL as an excuse to not have a strong body, and to not do athletic things.

I just have figured out the things that I can do, that is not threatening to injure my knee, my right knee. I’ve found a brace that I absolutely love. I bought several of them so they’re always with me. And I just wear my brace. And so, I’ve never said, “I can’t do it because of my knee.” I just don’t. So, my knee has never ever been a problem for me. My car air conditioning and it being in the shop is absolutely not a problem for me. Something amazing is happening all the time.

I focus on what is working and therefore everything in my life is working and I keep stepping forward. I keep moving the needle forward. I keep the momentum going forward in my life. I wake up every single day, every single morning like it is Christmas morning, so excited about my day. And I promise you, if I can do it, you can do it. It’s not just me, I’m not a special unicorn, it’s that I know how to manage my mind. I know how to regulate my thoughts and regulate my emotions. I want to feel good every single day.

And it’s because of the thoughts that I think on purpose that I feel good, and happy, and excited, and motivated every single day at the age of 61. I put myself in situations, in masterminds. I have a coach every single week that helps me clean out my mind and focus on the thoughts that are useful and adopt the new thoughts that will get me to where I want to go. And I want to be that coach for you. One week from when you’re listening to this my coaching group starts and there is a spot for you. I want you to take that spot.

I want you to get in this container and start cleaning out your mind and adopting new ideas and new possibilities, new ways of thinking, new beliefs that are going to get you where you want to go, to help you to create the exact life you want. You will love being in this group. You will feel like I did when I walked into that mastermind for the first time, something amazing is going to happen in this room. And I knew it and it absolutely did. I always get the results that I want because of it.

I want you to learn how to do that too for yourself, you will love your life, you will uplevel your life, you will get so much more out of your life especially if you’re in the second half of life. Let’s break the old model my friends, and let’s be women of grit, women of possibility, women of strength, women who believe in themselves and believe in being an example of what’s possible. That’s us, I promise you, that’s you and I.

Alright, come be my next new client in this group, I can’t wait to meet you. I can’t wait to work with you. Let’s just get working on your life, you’ll never be the same. You will love every single ounce of the process. Alright, I love you, have the best week. Share this podcast episode with your friends, anyone that you know that will benefit from it, anyone that you know that needs to know that something amazing is always happening whether you can see it or not. That’s a good useful thought. Alright, love you so much, see you next Thursday.

Thanks for listening to Reinvented After 40. If you want more information or resources from the podcast, please visit KymShowersLifeCoach.com.