On Thursday, November 4th, 2021, my precious, adorable, very beloved Dad passed away. These last couple of weeks have been incredibly sad and intense, and I wasn’t sure I would be able to record a podcast episode. But then I thought to myself, what would my dad do?
My dad lived his life with integrity, honor, generosity, humor, and love. He was a shining example of a life well-lived, and he offered so much goodness and value to the world. He deserved every ounce of happiness. So in honor of my extraordinary father this week, I wanted to share some of the things that my dad taught me.
My dad was absolutely everything to me, and all of my good qualities came from him. He taught me how to dream big, make the impossible possible, and love people unconditionally. I wish you could have known him because I am sure that he would have enriched your life as he did so many others. In this episode, I’m telling you more about my incredible dad and sharing with you the valuable lessons he taught me because I know they will be beneficial to all.
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Hey, friends. Welcome to Reinvented After 40, a podcast for all you women in the second half of life who are ready to take responsibility for your own well-being and create a life you love living.
I’m your host, Kym Showers, and after spending the first 40 years of my life people-pleasing and following all the rules, I was exhausted and ready for a change. I reinvented myself. I stopped outsourcing my happiness. And I’ve been brave enough to live a different kind of life.
I’ll be here each week to help you do the same thing. It’s gonna be fun. Let’s go.
Hey, friends, one week ago today last Thursday November 4th, 2021, my precious adorable, very beloved dad passed away. This has been an incredibly sad and intense week. I wasn’t sure I was going to be able to record a podcast episode this week and I knew you would understand. But then I thought, what would my dad do? What would Tom McCarthy do? And you know what he’d do? He’d record the podcast. So here I am in honor of him to share with you some of the things my dad taught me.
So let me tell you a little about my extraordinary father. He named me Kimberley D. McCarthy and has always called me Kimmy D. He was magical in every way, light-hearted and funny, and so cute. He had a natural Irish whimsy about him and was filled with a zest for life until his very last breath. He loved living. Even when things were difficult and he was carrying a heavy load he’d never let it keep him down and he never let on to us.
He rose to every occasion and every challenge with integrity, determination, grace and always a sense of humor. Nothing was a problem for him. He was a master problem solver. He married my mom when he was 21 and she was 16. And they had three babies in their first three years of marriage. I can’t even begin to imagine the craziness and responsibility of that for such a young man. And then they had my baby sister 10 years later. He was our steady source of love, and safety, and kept our family afloat and intact through good times and bad.
He was committed to us four kids and made sure we had every single thing we needed. He is the reason I’ve always been able to easily believe in that unconditional love of God. My entire life I’ve been loved and supported by a dad who was unoffendable and unbothered by my mistakes and my weaknesses, and a dad who never kept score. He was generously available to me and to all of us whenever we needed him. I never questioned his love for me. He was always there for me and told me he loved me every time we talked. I know how lucky I am.
He was curious, and smart, and liked to learn, and create, and engineer, and build. He loved a good challenge. He was a fireman, brave and resourceful, and helped anyone and everyone every day of his life. It was just who he was. He didn’t hesitate to pull over and help a stranger change a tire or fix an engine. I grew up with a dad who literally could fix anything. And so I just assumed all dads were like that. He was our mechanic, our handyman, our plumber, our electrician. He loved a project. If we needed furniture he would design and build it.
If we needed a fence or a gate, he would design and build it. He was a master artist and craftsman and was generous with his skills. Everyone in his life had something built or fixed by Tom. I can’t tell you how many times he said, “Sure honey, I’ll stop by and take a look at it.” Or “Drop it by honey and I’ll fix it.” He’d give the shirt off of his back if we needed it. Nothing was a problem or too big of an ask. He was so much fun and loved to have fun. He was adventuresome, snow ski trips, and golf trips, and cycling trips, and some boat trips.
He had lots of close friends and traveling partners. He loved to tell stories and laugh and just be together, that was his favorite. He was the patriarch of our extended family, intentionally close to his siblings, nephews and nieces. He treated my cousins like his own. He was proud of everyone and really good at letting us all know how he felt about us, the best shower-upper.
He met the true love of his life, Debbie Ritchie on a blind date in December 1998 and he was never the same in the most extraordinary way and it was delightful to witness. They were the perfect match and adored each other. They traveled the world together and made so many amazing memories with family and friends and were always the first ones at every event and party. They brought all the love and fun wherever they went. Dad gained a beautiful, devoted wife and we gained a super fun mom.
It was such a joy to see my dad that incredibly in love and genuinely happy these past 23 years, he deserved every ounce of it. He lived his life with integrity, honor, generosity, humor and love. His word was gold. I trusted him without doubt. He didn’t hold a grudge or speak unkindly about anyone. He always took the high road and taught us to do the same. He was my example of a life well lived. He squeezed every ounce of it out and left not one thing on the table.
He was born with an abundant mindset, there was always more than enough to go around. You don’t turn anyone away, you just build a bigger table. He was extremely intelligent, humble and the hardest worker. His projects never felt like work to him. He literally whistled while he worked long hours in his workshop. He offered so much goodness and value to the world. He had an incredibly positive disposition and it was contagious. All the good things about me came from him. He was my hero and my mentor and I will continue to work to make him proud.
I got to have my dad for 60 years and I am forever grateful, he was everything to me and I’ll love and miss him forever. He taught me how to dream big and to make the impossible possible, to love people without conditions and to be the one to forgive, forget, make peace and move on. I’m the luckiest daughter to have had the experience of the most extraordinary father. I wish you all could have known him, you would have loved him. He was the real deal.
I’ll leave you with some of the things he said often. Sure, honey, not a problem. Family is everything. Always take the high road. You can’t be too generous. Do what you say you’re going to do. Give everyone the benefit of the doubt. Never give up, never quit, everything’s going to be okay. And my favorite, leave it better than you found it. That he did, thanks daddy, you indeed loved us all better. I’ll love and miss you forever. And thank you friends for showing up today. I’ll see you next week.
Thanks for listening to Reinvented After 40. If you want more information or resources from the podcast, please visit KymShowersLifeCoach.com.
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